you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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