I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
