What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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