Have you finally orgasmed yet?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize