Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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