she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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