I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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