Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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