girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
