omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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