I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
