How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize
