i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
