is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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