Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
