she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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