I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
