ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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