Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
be right there i have to get my cape
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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