I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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