if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
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