its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
