just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
