Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
