when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I am one with the molecules
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
