you guys were way drunker than both of me
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
