I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
