What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Randomize