hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
this will be a night to untag.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
