Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize