i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
its not stalking. its research.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
