alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Randomize
