Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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