And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
