dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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