what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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