hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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