Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
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