we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize