Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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