let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
The air was thick with penises
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
