i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
