the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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