If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
