And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
