4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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