Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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