I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
