Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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