i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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