if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
