all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
